like i have said in my previous entry: if you read this i mean the little that i write.
i can't get you out of mind. i can't get you out of my mouth. i can't get you out of my eyes. i can't get you out of my ears. i can't get you out of my chest. i can't get you out of my lungs. i can't get you out of my breath. i stare @ my phone as the seconds, minutes, hours pass me by..... i'm waiting to fall asleep, but i can't. i can't get you out of my _________ i guess you can fill whatever you want into those blanks and it would match, cause everything about myself right now is captured by the essence of you. simply put: I MISS YOU... INDEFINITELY.
Location:home Mood: sad Music: the cure: just like heaven
went out to have some sushi with a special someone and it was a very nice time. probably the most fun I have had with uncooked meat in a long time. I got her to try some spicy tuna kobachi which is uncooked tuna drizzled with oil, spicy oil, sea salt, and cracked pepper. absolutely delicious. she actually enjoyed it, which was definitely a suprise. i didn't think she was going to like raw fish. she always told me that sashimi was disguisting and that she would never try it. but I never told her that the tuna wasn't cooked until it was over. she nearly killed me, but admitted that it was amazingly good. I told her that sashimi was similiar to the kobachi. the only difference with sashimi is that there is no sauce that is drizzled upon it. that night went pretty well. I'm at her house right now and will probably stay for a while. She will be leaving to Michigan this Friday. I really don't want her to leave cause I let her go before.... again, and again, and again. not in the sense of getting out of state, but away from my grasp. I will definitely miss her with more of my heart than ever before. I really wished I did things different this summer. I wish I could have gotten back together with her, but I guess it's too late for now. When she gets back she will definitely know what is truely in my heart. I love you if you ever read this. Very much. Tu carino
the day after you finally get recognized as an official RN is a bit confusing, but in a good way. I feel light- unweighted with crap that used to boggle my mind. I woke up not worrying about a test that I would have this week, the next day, the next month. I woke up early..... way to early for a saturday morning. it was out of the ordinary. it was........... refreshing
growth. sometimes we have days where everything is just a massive down pour- like a fuckin hail storm just pummels you down to the ground, making you feel as if you can't get up. as time fly's by, something brightens up your life and you begin to grow back up again. you begin to rise to certain occassions and instances in your life because of that certain ray of hope/light or whatever the fuck you want to call it. law of equivalent exchange is something we cannot escape, something we shouldn't want to escape. rain sun= planets grow. soak up those down pours in life to make yourself grow into something beautiful, something incredible..... never give a fuck if the down pours seem like tsunami's... cause when it's all over, you will be there standing, slanting, sitting, laying beaten down and broken, but your still there...... just something on my mind
I just got back from my cousin's house. We stayed up and watched movies all night from around 10:00 pm to about 6:30 am. It was fun seeing the two of them laughing and acting foolish (as always- especially my guy cousin). One of his hero's is Will Farrell. Interesting enough his name is Willy. We said that we were going to see Tellegada (I think that's how you spell it) Knights The Story of Ricky Bobby together when it comes out. We have watched all of Will Farrell's movies together, and have a laughed and recited the same jokes from each movie verbatim till our eyes filled with tiny drops of water. The movie comes out on August 4th. Guess will just have to postpone watching it together.
good night
Location:home Mood: sleepy Music: mat kearney: nothing left to lose
woke up this morning around 6 am. went out for a jog and felt so damn sticky. outside in the morning is nothing but muggy weather... i was sweating more than i intended. I got back home around 7:30 am or so and took a shower for about an hour, just soaking my body in the cool water. after the nice shower, I worked on my commencement speech as response to the guest speaker that we will be having on friday night July 28th. Took me an 1 hour to write 2 1/2 pages. I have another 2 1/2 to go, but I am lazy to finish it right now. I started doing push-ups and sit ups while watching tv- that ended in an hour. I got dressed and decided to go the mall. Wardrobe consisted of: asics tai-chi shoes, argyle socks, diesel zathan 772 jeans, black armani undershirt, diesel button up shirt. I wanted to go visit my cousin that would be leaving to texas august 1st. I am going to miss her and him. That is the reason why I am at my cousin's house right now. He is playing on the computer some kind of poker tournament. I'm playing around on his guitar and reminiscing on times well spent with him. It sucks when you know your core people are leaving you to fend for yourself in this cruel cruel world (lol..i sound like a soap opera). I go back to work in the hospital tomorrow night. Another shift of 7pm-7am. 12 blissful hours of caring for people.
good night
Location:cousin's house Mood: blank Music: original composition
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